Finally Courageous Enough to Give My First Talk
As I heard the host call out my name to give my talk on that stage, I walked nervously to the center and took a deep breath before launching into my pitch. All my energy went into taking in the present moment. "About 600 people are here to listen to what I have to say. Let's savor it, as this opportunity will likely only come once," I said to myself. During my talk, I scanned the audience during my regular pauses and saw my pitch coach nodding with approval and giving me a thumbs up. I suddenly started feeling very confident in my talk, and to my surprise, I found myself enjoying the spotlight—the same spotlight I had always dreaded. The whole experience taught me some of the most important lessons of my life.
In the weeks leading up to my talk, the mind was overwhelmed with self-doubt. "I'm going to make a fool of myself.", "I'm not a good public speaker, why are you even trying?", what a challenge it was to not let these thoughts get the best of me. This inner dialogue has been with me for as long as I could remember. Me fighting it was like pulling roots out of hardened soil. This is how I found the courage to face one of my biggest fears and a let go of a part of me that stalled my growth.
As a boy growing up on an island in the northeast Caribbean, I was timid and shy. My biggest fear was being laughed at or seen as incompetent. I vividly remember one embarassing moment when my math teacher asked me to stand and answer a question. Even though I knew the answer, my nerves caused me to blank out. My classmates' laughed. From that moment, I avoided the spotlight at all costs.
Fast forward 10 years to the completion of my graduation internship at Philips, my mentor, Marcel, handed me a parting gift—a book titled "Speak, Inspire, Empower" by an author called Mark Robinson. Holding the book in my hands, I immediately though, "Miguel, If you want to achieve your goals in life, you need to be able to do this". Although I hadn't yet had a concrete opportunity to speak in front of others, I was eager to learn and prepare myself for the moment when it inevitably arrived. The prospect of public speaking seemed surprisingly attainable after reading the book. It was time to put theory into practice.
A year later, my company received a nomination for the National Health Innovation Prize, and the need arose for someone to represent us at the event. When my colleagues asked if I would be interested, my initial reaction was the same one I had as a little boy. To hide, to avoid. The thought of standing before hundreds of people intimidated me —surely, I would embarrass myself, I hesitated, responding with a tentative "I'll think about it."
However, after allowing myself time to reflect, I realized that giving in to fear would mean missing a valuable opportunity for growth. I posed a question to myself: "If I were at the end of my life, would I regret letting fear dictate my choices?" All the insights from my reading would be meaningless if I didn't put them into practice. I made the decision to step out of my comfort zone and seize the opportunity.
I started to apply everything I learned in the book I received from my mentor. How to structure my talk, my body language, gestures and practice. I took every opportunity to practice. I asked my friends, my family, my colleagues, to watch my talk and to give me their feedback. I practiced hours in front of the mirror, almost every day. But there was something no preperation or book could help me with—my emotions. The closer I got to the event, the more thoughts there were of self-doubt. Again, the old memories started coming back to me. I started feeling overwhelmed. "Why did I say yes to this? I cannot do it, my pitch is not good enough" I thought. Fear was talking, and I was listening.
These emotions were extremely strong, eventually it took over me. This wasn't new to me, in fact, I have had other moments in my life where my emotions would take over. I ultimately learned one of the most valuable things I have learned on my journey to learning public speaking
"If I knew what you think, I would know what you are, for your thoughts make you what you are. By changing our thoughts, we can change our lives".
I started to think positive, "Imagine how it looks like when it all works out, imagine you are announced the winner, imagine people clapping because you delivered such a great pitch". These diverted my natural fear-inducing thoughts to positive ones.
Finally, the day of the event arrived. I walked into the venue, went to the front desk to get my badge, and the familiar thoughts of fear lingered in my mind. But I remembered how to focus on the positive aspects of the experience, I was able to let go of the fear like watching cars passing by on a highway. Soon, we were directed to the main room where the event was to take place. After a few speakers, it was time for the eight nominees, including myself, to take the stage for our pitches. As each person gave their pitch, I couldn't help but feel the nervous energy building up, knowing I would be the last to speak.
The host announced my name, and as I made my way to the center. Taking hold of the microphone and meeting the eyes of the audience, I launched into my pitch. With each step I took on the stage, I felt myself relax, embracing the joy of public speaking—a skill I never thought I'd come to enjoy. As I delivered my closing words, the sound of applause filled the room. Surprised and relieved by the positive reception, I found myself approached by several individuals afterward, offering compliments on my performance. What an unforgettable moment!
Conquering my fear of public speaking was more than just a personal triump; it was a journey of self-discovery and empowerment. It taught me that fear is not the enemy but rather a catalyst for growth and transformation. Without fear, how do you develop courage?
"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear."